Little discoveries

So the other day i was thinking about people, and i find many people to be attention seeking. Now really who doesn't love a little attention. Even those kids that sit in the corner because they are too shy or are affraid of attention. and i think that the reason for most of our reactions are because of or are for attention.

When you think of attention seekers most of us prolly think of the pigs of guys that shout at girls, of the drama queen who does things just to make you look at her, maybe the kid who thinks making fun of someone makes them cooler, but for me i think of the people who don't get enough attention. The kid who is depressed and cuts themselves, the boy who sits by himself at the lunch table, the person who is affraid of the world, or the girl who looks for attention from boys for the lack of attention she get else where.

Where does the lack of attention come from? Part of me thinks it is their fault, now now, calm yourself let me explain. I think that for me little things are my attention fixes. Examples!: my dad made me mickey mouse pancakes the other day and then then said that once he sold the snowmobile that he could pay for me to see my wonderful sister and brother. Which i understand prolly wont happen but i don't mind just him thinking of me makes me feel like i am important to him. My mother is always trusting me and telling me things that she says she "shouldn't be telling me" but it shows she loves me and trusts me with things. She also does things like remembering how much i like bigger meat chunks in my spaghetti and when i look down at my bowl filled with oodles of noodles and see the massive meat chucks it makes me feel warm and fussy inside. And my sister (or sister in law, i know, i just think its cool to have a sister) her being able to hang with someone my age and not act any different and trust me with the things she has problems with makes me feel like we actually are sisters and it was always like that, and nothing could change that. And my friends help me alot, they are always showing me how much they care about me and just laughing with them shows me how much they want to see me be happy.:] i think if people looked at life in a different prespective things would look alot better.

Then there is another part of me that makes me think it is the families fault. I see things like a mother caring more about her furnature then her own daugther and that hurt me i can't imagine how that makes her feel. I also see things like sexual abuse by someones family and things like teasing taken another level. and what do you do about things like that? There is not much to do to prevent things like that, other then learning from mistakes of others and following god. maybe not this one is just lose, its hard to blame families? ya know, ya know?

Another part ( yes the is lots to me) thinks that it is the day and age we live in. You can't talk to someone, go on the computer, turn on the radio, look at your cell phone without seeing or hearing something sad or bad. it puts a damper on your day and makes our out look on things change. If all you see out there is bad something that might actually be good might also seem bad, and if that is how people see things is in a negative way, it doesnt help anyone. More examples you say? of course i will give you examples! :] like early freshman year i got in a little pit of self pity, well i guess it wasn't so little. (Pity parties are stupid when they go on for a long periods of time, just to let ya no. ) And all i saw was bad so when someone would give me a compliment it make my self confidence trip down into a abis of self conscious.It was because i thought they were making fun of me or trying to hurt me in some way and this was because all i saw was bad, and it was sad for me but i got over it and now i see things in a different light. Seeing the Happieness in things makes us see that all the attention we need is in little things like the people that you may find a little annoyying that you wake up to in the morning, or the friends that surround you that make you feel like you can concore the world and the greatest one of all the king that is always watching you and gracing you with the gift of life each and every morning. Things like that can change you and the world around you.

ANY WHO! what i am trying to say is people we have to see things in a positive light rather then be a little miss rain clouds in my pants, and start seeing yourself as important and that you get attention in millions of small ways rather then getting attention in only the ways you want. :]]]

live life. love god.